I was a very shy and introverted kid. Being in an upper class family, I went to the best schools. But for some strange reason, kids in elementary school avoided me, so I did the same towards them.
I guess I first felt same-sex urges when
I was about 5. We had an adult male on staff in our house, and I recall being very attracted to him. One morning, before everyone was awake, I climbed into bed with him.
Nothing happened, but I felt a great sense of warmth and security. I liked it so much, I made it a habit to wake up early, just to snuggle in next to him.
Then one morning my elder sister "caught" me, and had a disgusted look on her face. It was enough to stop me from any further sleep-in's!
I never told anyone about my homosexuality until my late 20's.
Aside from a brief "encounter" with the family chauffeur, I never fooled around with another boy until I was 11. I wasn’t scared at all. In fact, I was very calm about the whole thing, while it lasted.
My intuition told me that my dad knew I was different, even if he didn't say much. He always told me I was his special child, so that might have been his way of acknowledging my difference.
I came out to my mom after dad died, which was a big mistake. She didn't do anything harsh, but she was totally cold. It was a good thing I'd been living on my own by then.